Hello everyone, hope your new year is going well thus far! For future Saturday Sounds we are hoping to put together covers, interviews and short story readings so stay tuned! As for this Saturday, here's a video of the Accountants covering MGMT's Kids.
Have a great weekend, everyone!
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Top Five Friday: New Years Resolutions
Happy New Year everyone! To ring in the new decade, we have collected 5 resolutions to help you confirm your own.
1.Bobby Flay- I need to be a better person... I need to stop "throwing down".
Bobby Flay has always been the all around American asshole but when he started his show "Throwdown! with Bobby Flay", friends were more hesitant than usual.
"I don't know, Bobby," sighed Flay's colleague Guy Fieri, "I really think this makes you sound like a douche."
The show is composed of professional chef/small time celebrity Bobby Flay visiting the kitchens of amateur cooks who believe they are auditioning for a show on Food Network. He asks them what they cook best, what food they pride themselves in, what dreams they have, and he tries to crush them.
Flay was turned down by ESPN for his original pilot "Kickball! with Bobby Flay" in which Bobby Flay plays recess games against 4th graders. Although it is speculated that the network turned down Flay due to the pathetic content, the official reason was due to the injuries of at least seven 9 year olds and one teacher.
When asked about his resolution, Flay threw his arms in the air with a sense of misplaced rebellion. "Fine!" he yelled two notches too loud, "I fuckin' resolve to not being a dick, are you happy?! This party's more boring than Alton's boring-ass science show anyway."
After this statement, Flay continued on to stomp out of the party with a displaced sense of rebellion, knocking over several of Paula Deen's quiches. It should be added that the hosts' dogs ate the quiches off the floor and minutes later suffered severe heart failure.
2.Leona Lewis- I'm gonna get my debts in check.
Modern day diva Leona Lewis has admitted that just as 2009 was a difficult year for the nation's economy, her own accounts have been looking a bit dry.
"In 2009, I just kept bleeding love," she chuckled with a noticeable sense of shame, "but you know what, 2010 is a new year and... I've learned from my mistakes."
Lewis plans on not just putting a gauze over her love blood letting but she has hired a top notch accountant to help her along the way. The level headed singer is going to place 50% of the love she earns during 2010 into a love-specific trust account as well as pulling out cold love to spend rather than losing all of her love through love credit and ending up in severe love debt.
"Sure, I've got so much love to give," admitted Lewis, "but I've got all my life to live and.. well you know the rest."
3.Red Skull- I am going to be more honest with you next time I try to kill or not kill Captain America.
Who can forget that less that three years ago, Captain America was put to rest in the Arlington National Cemetery due to a devious plot devised by Red Skull. The plan was relatively simple, have Dr. Faustus plant subconscious suggestions in Sharon Carter's brain, hire Crossbones as a sniper, watch the United States mourn. But in July of last year, journalist Ed Brubaker revealed that Red Skull had not in fact murdered Captain America but had transported him to a place that he couldn't himself find.
"I don't remember ever specifically saying Captain America was dead, you know," confessed Red Skull, nursing a warm Heineken at the Watcher's annual New Year's party. "The whole thing just got out of hand, everyone was like 'oh God, Rogers is dead?!' and who am I to say 'no, ABC news, he's just in some out of synch alternate dimension that I kinda lost', you know."
Skull went on to explain that he understands that even though the media was a bit too quick to jump to their conclusions, he should have been more clear and that the blame is without a doubt on his head and his alone. His 2010 resolution is to hold fast to the truth next time.
"I hate rumors," laughed Red Skull, "but you can only do so much."
4.Shakespeare- The time hath come to rid myself of the black habit.
It may come as a surprise to most literary fans that William Shakespeare has chosen abstinence as his New Year's resolution. Shakespeare, the author of blockbuster hits such as teen romance Romeo and Juliet and the high octane thriller King Leer, announced his resolution at fellow writer Chris T. Marlowe's gathering.
"Aye, aye, I'll deliver to thee my resolve," stammered a slightly inebriated Shakespeare, "upon the last ink stroke of my next play, may ale never ail again."
Though theatre critics have interpreted Shakespeare's slurs as undoubtably a brilliant reproach from alcohol, close friends of William beg to differ.
"I think it's a bit of shit," laughed actor Richard Burbage, "he says he is to stop drinking upon the completion of his next play Love's Labors Won. I don't think he'll even write it."
When asked about this accusation, Shakespeare merely replied with "tis my right to write." Scholars and high school students alike have been analyzing this since statement since.
5. Nurse Joy- It's time to organize... a union.
While most of the attention of New Year's resolutions have centered around celebrities, well known personalities and Bobby Flay, little time has been paid to hard working citizens such as Lavender Town's Nurse Joy.
"I know how hard times are and that we are in a recession but this is an injustice," snarled Nurse Joy, "and the Pokemon hospitalization system cannot just keep paying Nurse Joys minimum wage without benefits!"
"I agree," agreed Nurse Joy from Saffron City, "and 2010 is no better time to start a union."
But not all Nurse Joys share this mentality. Nurse Joy from Pewter City sees unionization a step in the wrong direction.
"I don't know about the other Nurse Joys but this Nurse Joy didn't get into the medical field for the money and to be honest, we need to focus our efforts on making universal health care for Pokemon and Poketrainers whether they can afford it or not. Have you seen how expensive private insurance is for even just a metapod?! It's ridiculous!"
Though the Nurse Joys might not all see this issue in the same light, they all come together over one other new development.
"Starting January 2010, our restraining order kicks in," smiled Nurse Joy from Viridian City enjoying her vacation on Cinnabar Island, "which means that none of us will be seeing anymore of that Brock so... it's going to be a good decade no matter what Pokemon politics go on."
Happy New Year everyone!
1.Bobby Flay- I need to be a better person... I need to stop "throwing down".
Bobby Flay has always been the all around American asshole but when he started his show "Throwdown! with Bobby Flay", friends were more hesitant than usual.
"I don't know, Bobby," sighed Flay's colleague Guy Fieri, "I really think this makes you sound like a douche."
The show is composed of professional chef/small time celebrity Bobby Flay visiting the kitchens of amateur cooks who believe they are auditioning for a show on Food Network. He asks them what they cook best, what food they pride themselves in, what dreams they have, and he tries to crush them.
Flay was turned down by ESPN for his original pilot "Kickball! with Bobby Flay" in which Bobby Flay plays recess games against 4th graders. Although it is speculated that the network turned down Flay due to the pathetic content, the official reason was due to the injuries of at least seven 9 year olds and one teacher.
When asked about his resolution, Flay threw his arms in the air with a sense of misplaced rebellion. "Fine!" he yelled two notches too loud, "I fuckin' resolve to not being a dick, are you happy?! This party's more boring than Alton's boring-ass science show anyway."
After this statement, Flay continued on to stomp out of the party with a displaced sense of rebellion, knocking over several of Paula Deen's quiches. It should be added that the hosts' dogs ate the quiches off the floor and minutes later suffered severe heart failure.
2.Leona Lewis- I'm gonna get my debts in check.
Modern day diva Leona Lewis has admitted that just as 2009 was a difficult year for the nation's economy, her own accounts have been looking a bit dry.
"In 2009, I just kept bleeding love," she chuckled with a noticeable sense of shame, "but you know what, 2010 is a new year and... I've learned from my mistakes."
Lewis plans on not just putting a gauze over her love blood letting but she has hired a top notch accountant to help her along the way. The level headed singer is going to place 50% of the love she earns during 2010 into a love-specific trust account as well as pulling out cold love to spend rather than losing all of her love through love credit and ending up in severe love debt.
"Sure, I've got so much love to give," admitted Lewis, "but I've got all my life to live and.. well you know the rest."
3.Red Skull- I am going to be more honest with you next time I try to kill or not kill Captain America.
Who can forget that less that three years ago, Captain America was put to rest in the Arlington National Cemetery due to a devious plot devised by Red Skull. The plan was relatively simple, have Dr. Faustus plant subconscious suggestions in Sharon Carter's brain, hire Crossbones as a sniper, watch the United States mourn. But in July of last year, journalist Ed Brubaker revealed that Red Skull had not in fact murdered Captain America but had transported him to a place that he couldn't himself find.
"I don't remember ever specifically saying Captain America was dead, you know," confessed Red Skull, nursing a warm Heineken at the Watcher's annual New Year's party. "The whole thing just got out of hand, everyone was like 'oh God, Rogers is dead?!' and who am I to say 'no, ABC news, he's just in some out of synch alternate dimension that I kinda lost', you know."
Skull went on to explain that he understands that even though the media was a bit too quick to jump to their conclusions, he should have been more clear and that the blame is without a doubt on his head and his alone. His 2010 resolution is to hold fast to the truth next time.
"I hate rumors," laughed Red Skull, "but you can only do so much."
4.Shakespeare- The time hath come to rid myself of the black habit.
It may come as a surprise to most literary fans that William Shakespeare has chosen abstinence as his New Year's resolution. Shakespeare, the author of blockbuster hits such as teen romance Romeo and Juliet and the high octane thriller King Leer, announced his resolution at fellow writer Chris T. Marlowe's gathering.
"Aye, aye, I'll deliver to thee my resolve," stammered a slightly inebriated Shakespeare, "upon the last ink stroke of my next play, may ale never ail again."
Though theatre critics have interpreted Shakespeare's slurs as undoubtably a brilliant reproach from alcohol, close friends of William beg to differ.
"I think it's a bit of shit," laughed actor Richard Burbage, "he says he is to stop drinking upon the completion of his next play Love's Labors Won. I don't think he'll even write it."
When asked about this accusation, Shakespeare merely replied with "tis my right to write." Scholars and high school students alike have been analyzing this since statement since.
5. Nurse Joy- It's time to organize... a union.
While most of the attention of New Year's resolutions have centered around celebrities, well known personalities and Bobby Flay, little time has been paid to hard working citizens such as Lavender Town's Nurse Joy.
"I know how hard times are and that we are in a recession but this is an injustice," snarled Nurse Joy, "and the Pokemon hospitalization system cannot just keep paying Nurse Joys minimum wage without benefits!"
"I agree," agreed Nurse Joy from Saffron City, "and 2010 is no better time to start a union."
But not all Nurse Joys share this mentality. Nurse Joy from Pewter City sees unionization a step in the wrong direction.
"I don't know about the other Nurse Joys but this Nurse Joy didn't get into the medical field for the money and to be honest, we need to focus our efforts on making universal health care for Pokemon and Poketrainers whether they can afford it or not. Have you seen how expensive private insurance is for even just a metapod?! It's ridiculous!"
Though the Nurse Joys might not all see this issue in the same light, they all come together over one other new development.
"Starting January 2010, our restraining order kicks in," smiled Nurse Joy from Viridian City enjoying her vacation on Cinnabar Island, "which means that none of us will be seeing anymore of that Brock so... it's going to be a good decade no matter what Pokemon politics go on."
Happy New Year everyone!
Welcome to Daily TurnON!
Hello and welcome to Daily TurnON, a blog dedicated to creative projects ranging from video shorts to short stories to visual art. Starting January 2010, the schedule will be as follows:
Monday- Movie Mondays: movie posters for flicks that should never exist.
Tuesday- Terribly Told Tuesdays: tales from the Terribly Told video blogger
Wednesday- Poetic Waste Wednesdays: utter/atrocious/poetry
Thursday- Three Paragraph Thursdays: Short prose in three paragraphs
Friday- Top Five Fridays: uncanny countdown lists
Saturday- Saturday Sound: audio related segments
Sunday- Sunday Funnies: your weekend comic strips
And every month there will be project festivals, such as the annual 13 Days, 13 Shorts.
If you would like to receive updates as to these festivals or would like to submit to Daily TurnON, please email Omar at Omar.Najam@gmail.com!
Thank you so much for dropping by and we hope you enjoy!
Monday- Movie Mondays: movie posters for flicks that should never exist.
Tuesday- Terribly Told Tuesdays: tales from the Terribly Told video blogger
Wednesday- Poetic Waste Wednesdays: utter/atrocious/poetry
Thursday- Three Paragraph Thursdays: Short prose in three paragraphs
Friday- Top Five Fridays: uncanny countdown lists
Saturday- Saturday Sound: audio related segments
Sunday- Sunday Funnies: your weekend comic strips
And every month there will be project festivals, such as the annual 13 Days, 13 Shorts.
If you would like to receive updates as to these festivals or would like to submit to Daily TurnON, please email Omar at Omar.Najam@gmail.com!
Thank you so much for dropping by and we hope you enjoy!
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